To: Someone who I respect...
I'll support you...
This post is special for you...
maybe I don't know how pain the disease threat you...
maybe I don't know how suffer you are now...
but I know...
I know how is the pain when you operate...
cause I operate before...
When first time I went in the operation room...
I saw white...all is in white colour...
no black, no grey, no orange...no rainbow colour...
I afraid, but I don't understand why I afraid...
maybe I afraid that I'll leave my family, my friends...
ya, I knew that's just a small operation...
the same feeling that you had now...
is the same, very scare, very incompetency...
but I didn't tell anyone...I didn't...
I told myself, not to let my family worry...
NO~cannot!
okay, I went in the operation room...
there's cold, I'm not frightening you. No, I'm not...
Its cold...cold till can let you feel like you are dead...
the operation room is big...but is cold...
very cold~you got go to any place where very cold?
try to imagine...didn't wear any clothes and go in an air-conditioned room (16 celcius)...
try to imagine...~
the doctor put some chloroform...
you feel so sleepy...wanna sleep already~
the doctor ask you "not to sleep so early, we have to double check again"
you have to fight with the chloroform...you must endure...
finally, they double check already...
but they let you breath in chloroform again...
feel so sleepy~
ya!
Its the time that I very afraid...
very very very scare...
you scare that your life is the end now...
the God want you go back...
cannot let you stay anymore...
you try to fight with the chloroform...
but you lose...
Its the time that everything change to dark in colour...
all is dark...
I tell you all this because I want you to be brave...
not to scare of the doctor, not to scare of the chloroform, not to scare of the God!
you can't scare of anything!
THINK! you haven't get the happiness that you want!
you haven't get the love that you want!
NO! you haven't do many things!
YOU HAVEN'T DO ANYTHING FOR YOUR FAMILY!
WAKE UP NOW!!!
DON'T BE AFRAID!!!
STAND STRAIGHT AND TELL THE GOD "I'M NOT SCARE OF YOU!"
come on! cheer up!
you are live for yourself!
not for any one!
DON'T TRY TO GIVE UP ON YOURSELF!
if you do it, I'll look down on you!
you told me before "NOT TO GIVE UP ON ANYTHING THAT YOU WANT!"
and now I tell you! "DON'T TRY TO GIVE UP ON YOURSELF, ANYTHING THAT YOU WANT!"
"DON'T TRY TO LEAVE YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS!!!"
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